What age can someone be a bully?
When my son was 4 he has just started reception, He had been there for a good 3 month before everything started. Just after Christmas he started coming home & Telling me that a certain 3 boys kept being nasty to him! Of course kids will be kids, I popped in to see his teacher so she could try & See what was going on. She come back to me & Said she got the 3 boys & My son together to try & Resolve any issues. So I left it at that!
Edwards first day in reception. All happy!
Not even a week later I noticed my son’s legs covered in bruises! My heart crushed there & Then! He was asleep so he didn’t see me get upset but he was covered, Both legs even had bruises on the insides of the legs! I come to the conclusion that if he fell over or banged his leg (He is so clumsy lol) it would be front facing on the leg not the inside’s! So how did he have bruises there? Of course I went back to the school to raise these issues & Again she said she would sort it & Watch them on there break times. End of the day arrived & She pulled me to the side, She said she watched all the boys on their breaks & Didn’t see anything happen! That evening i sat my son down & Asked him where these bruises had come from? After all the school were not helping me. Then my worst fears came true! I was always scared of this happening but hoped it never would, Sadly it was happening. My son told me the names of the 3 boys & Said that they had held his hands behind his back while the other child hit him! He said he told the teacher & She said they didn’t mean to they were just playing! PLAYING? How can that be even classed as playing!
So back to the school I went again, This time the teacher told me that these 3 boys had been in nursery with each other so they are used to it (Play fighting) How she could say my sons injuries was caused by playing fight I will never know, My son never even played with these boys! Of course as a mother trying to protect my son i took it to the headteacher of the school. Well she was as much use as a plank of wood to say the least, She thought it would be a good idea to force the boys & My son to be friends! Of course my son didn’t want to why would he? After all they did was bully him. It finally reached the point where my son didn’t want to go to school, He would cry & Scream in the street, He wouldn’t walk because he simply was too scared to go! I couldn’t blame him it was late march now nearly a whole 3 months of being bullied with no resolution, This was not like my little boy at all!
My unhappy little boy wouldnt leave my side.
I called the school time & Time again telling them he was simply refusing to come to school, All I ever got in reply was ‘Oh that’s not like Edward, Can you not put him in a pushchair to get him here?’ Edward had just turned 5 in the january! He wasnt not going to school because he didn’t want to walk but they clearly never got it. Eventually the headteacher said she could fit us in for a meeting (Great i thought she now may see the extent of the bullying) How wrong was i? She didn’t like me using the BULLY word. In her eyes they are just 5 year olds they can’t possibly be bully’s! When the same 3 children are going for my son everyday for 3 month, Holding him down & Holding his hands behind his back & Covering him in bruises! In my eyes that is bullying. Nothing playing about that at all! She wouldn’t agree so i told her i was removing my child from her school, I could no longer face seeing my child hurt & Upset.
He is such a loving, Caring, Well mannered little boy! He would never harm a fly nevermind another child. I watched my little boy go from a happy-go-lucky little boy to a sad quiet withdrawn little boy. Even when he come home he never wanted to play he just wanted to stay with me, It literally broke my heart in to a million pieces! 5-year-old or 15-year-old it doesn’t matter, Once they start targeting a certain person, Calling them names, Hitting them & Just being plain nasty then they become a bully!
My son has now been in his new school nearly a year & He’s back to his normal little self! He’s made so many new friends, He goes to & From school happy & If there is just a little something happening the school are really good & Nip it in the bud before it gets worse! He even wanted to go school this year on his birthday to share his day with his friends unlike the year before.
I know I will never be to wrap him up in cotton wool & Protect him his whole life. But while I am living & Breathing I will do all i can to protect both of children!